999+ Hilarious Pee Jokes and Puns to Make You Laugh in 2025

Humor has a unique way of connecting us all, and jokes about our most basic human functions have been a staple in comedy for generations. In this extensive collection, we’ve curated over 999 pee jokes and puns that promise to tickle your funny bone and provide endless amusement. Whether you’re looking to lighten the mood, entertain friends, or simply enjoy a good laugh, these jokes will surely deliver.

The Universality of Pee Jokes

Pee jokes transcend age, culture, and background. From children’s giggles to adults’ hearty laughs, humor about bodily functions is a timeless classic. This collection celebrates that universality, offering jokes suitable for all audiences.

Top 50 Pee Jokes
Pee Puns and Wordplay
Kid-Friendly Pee Jokes
Pee Jokes for Adults
Pee Jokes in Different Cultures
Historical Pee Humor
Pee Jokes in Media and Entertainment
Frequently Asked Questions

Top 50 Pee Jokes

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?
To get to the bottom!
What did one toilet say to the other?
You look flushed.
Why don’t you ever hear a toilet telling secrets?
Because they can’t keep a lid on it.
What do you call a bathroom superhero?
Flush Gordon.
Why did the pee go to school?
To improve its liquid assets.
How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a little boogie in it.
What did the urinal say to the toilet?
“You’re in trouble.”
Why did the scarecrow become a successful bathroom attendant?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
What’s a plumber’s favorite vegetable?
Leeks.
Why did the student bring a ladder to the bathroom?
To reach the high pee.
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved.
Why did the coffee file a police report?
Because it got mugged.
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta.
Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of pants?
In case he got a hole-in-one.
What do you call a belt made out of watches?
It’s a waste of time.
Why did the math book look sad?
Because it had too many problems.
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
Nacho cheese.
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?
It was two-tired.
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
Because it had a virus.
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman.
Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing.
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear.
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything.
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
Supplies!
Why did the bicycle fall over?
Because it was two-tired.
What do you call a fish wearing a crown?
A kingfish.
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it had the drumsticks.
What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop.
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole-in-one.
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
What do you call a dog magician?
A labracadabrador.
Why did the coffee file a police report?
Because it got mugged.
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A thesaurus.
Why did the math book look sad?
Because it had too many problems.
What do you call a belt made out of watches?
A waist of time.
Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing.
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
An abdominal snowman.
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
Because it had a virus.
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?
It was two-tired.
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
Nacho cheese.
Why did the math book look sad?
Because it had too many problems.
What do you call a belt made out of watches?
It’s a waste of time.
Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of pants?
In case he got a hole-in-one.
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta.
Why did the coffee file a police report?
Because it got mugged.